A Mouse's Tale

Random scurryings of a writer.

“We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.” ~Kenji Miyazawa

Both of my grandparents on my mother’s side have passed away. Yes, their passing hurt me, but it was expected for so long that the pain was a numbing one.  When my uncle passed away, however, it was a searing pain due to the unexpectedness of it all. Once again, that pain has hit.

When your family has a home business for so long, you learn to think of certain workers of theirs as serrogant aunts and uncles. Well, I lost one of these uncles recently. I found out from Mom Sunday that Mark Fowler, someone I have known since I was about seven or so, took his life Thursday night in the same fashion as my blood uncle did back when I was a senior in high school. It’s just now setting into place the meaning of her words. Suicide is such an ugly thing, but it’s the person’s choice and one can not be angry at them for exercising said choice.

I have asked for next Monday off. It’s the soonest that I will have time to grieve. In the meanwhile, it is all locked away for later. This is how I deal with things. I pack it up like a fragile piece of decor and wait until just the right time. My students need me at my best for the rest of the week. That’s what I will give them, regardless as to whether or not it is socially acceptable.

I’ll miss you bunches, Mark.


3 responses to ““We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.” ~Kenji Miyazawa

  1. sensiblevermonter May 5, 2009 at 3:46 pm

    *Hugs* I am so very sorry to hear about your loss.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and all those who cared about him.

  2. Kaylin Cervini October 1, 2009 at 9:27 pm

    I love the quote “We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.” ~Kenji Miyazawa.

    My teacher Mr. David Heise sent me that quote after my 17 year old cousin, Christopher Cervini, was shot and killed in April of 2009. Not only was he my cousin, but a bestfriend, a brother. It was and still is, absolutely devistating for me and my family.

    Because of that quote I got a great idea for a song about my cousin… a song that I call “Burn it up.”

    A quote from song goes “If we use the power of tears, to find some good through the pain. We will survive through the years, and use heartbreak to our gain.”
    This quote was put on the back of my cousins gravestone.

    I “burn it up” by writing music, my cousin loved that about me…

    We all lose people in our lives, it is just how it works…. but if we can find any good through the pain, then we will find the will to go on, we will be “burning it up.”

    To view the song go to myspace.com/kaylincervini

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